Sorry for the long break between updates. I’m swamped. I have stuff to do for (literal) days. This is going to be a pretty bullet-list type of entry, so hopefully I cover every single topic even though they won’t be humorously segued into.

Number one, Devin is doing very well– a little jaundiced, but that’s normal. I was going to visit this weekend but had all the aforementioned crap to deal with, so I stayed home and’ll make the trip next weekend. Talked to my brother on the phone a little. He just landed what sounds like a dream job, and between that and his son, is on Cloud Nine. He was taking Devin to the pediatrician’s so he couldn’t talk long, and I think that was when it really hit me that MY BROTHER HAS A KID. Like, the birth is one thing. All those appointments afterward? That’s for REAL REAL.

Number two, thanks for all the comments and suggestions on/about/for the new theme! I’m touching stuff up here and there, but I don’t think it’ll see any major overhauls for another week. I’ll keep in all your ideas in mind. I have to say that the leaves, cute as they are, were a freebie from Smashing Magazine. I can’t take credit. If you aren’t aware of their AMAZING downloads, merry early Christmas. Enjoy.

I spent most of this week catering to Eli’s growing social calendar. He had a fundraiser at McDonald’s (SHELLY: He has those, like, once a week, right? ME: Pretty much, yeah.). The kid sitting next to us rides Eli’s bus, and he referred to me as “that lady that always hugs” him when he gets home. Aw. I love the title. Totally want to get it printed on all my non-existent business cards. The Lady Who Hugs You When You Get Home.

Friday night was Philip’s 6th birthday party. It was at a gym, which sort of enforced the idea that I need to get this body in some kind of shape, and fast. Parents were allowed to drop their kids off, but I chose to stay because there would be swimming involved. Elias is not a swimmer. All the little kindergarteners changed into their suits and then it turned out that the pool had been drained. Elias whispered to me, “HALLELUJAH!” I told him to keep it down, because the other kids were probably upset. (It turned out that the other kids didn’t want to swim either.)

Instead, they did rock climbing. Elias loves rock climbing now. He was like I GOT THIS! and attached himself, monkey-style, to the nearest wall. I was SO JEALOUS. I don’t know if I was allowed to do it, since I was a parent who didn’t sign any kind of waiver, but the desire was practically making my fingers itch. This rock gym was INSANE, too. Philip had apparently begged to try climbing for months, then cried as soon as it was his turn. I assured Lisa that it was completely normal. Elias sobbed, too. The first three times we went. And now look at him.

Luckily, I was right about this. Philip not only wasn’t scarred, he remembered it as going better than it did. Heh. Next was birthday pizza and cake upstairs (and the delivery man carried the pizza past, like, a HUNDRED people on treadmills– come on, Papa John’s. That’s cruel). Philip made a wish and blew out his candles.

The kids played some kind of “game” where they all sat on Philip and each other.

We finished with actual gym games. I took pictures and hung out with Lisa for the most part, but at the very end got to chuck balls at the kids for dodgeball. It would’ve been more awesome except I throw like a girl.

The party was three hours, and by the last hour I realized I hadn’t had any caffeine all day. My head was pounding. I got back home– after getting lost, boo to highway driving in the dark– and Jason wanted to talk downstairs. So we talked. Until almost midnight. I drank some Diet Pepsi, thinking it would help, but no go. By 11, all I wanted to do was sleep the headache off. I was like, “I’ll write an entry tomorrow instead”, and then the next day came, and I slept in and then Tara came over, and we went out to dinner and Target shopping, and sat up until almost 2 in the morning talking about families and high school. Jason actually went up to the attic to pull out some of his college art stuff. I think Tara thought I was joking about all the penises. I was not.

Today was doing Ali’s theme, which I am still hard at work on, and which she has been so patient about I feel like I should almost pay her to take it at this point. I broke three times, for thirty minutes each. Break one: stuff my mouth with Rice Krispies Treats. Break two: take kids to an indoor play place before someone goes clinically Stir Crazy. Break three: open up my novel, reread something I wrote at three in the morning to check if it made sense. Yes! and Delightful! I close the document. It really wasn’t that delightful, though. Someone was about to get eaten.

I only have one other remotely interesting thing to share, although I guess it isn’t as Interesting as it is I’m Not Crazy Right?. I have started eating Wint-o-green Lifesavers. By the bag. I eat like a bag a day. Despite my amazing breath, Jason can’t understand this phenomenon and Elias thinks they taste disgusting. What is wrong with my family? It’s like legal crack. In a ring shape.